Are you so busy striving you're missing what's right in front of you?

You can listen to a recording of these musings here.

Over Christmas I was clearing out an old draw and found a diary I'd written when I was about 25. At the front in large capital letters was a bullet list - 'Things to do before I turn 40' (I love that at the time I would have chosen 40 because it would have felt really old)!

Making this type of list was an annual event for me.

I'd start each January with a long list of goals I was going to achieve in the next 365 days.  Sometimes I'd even make 3, 5 or 10 year plans.

I enjoyed it.

I loved making lists - it made me feel like I had a plan and was in control (when inside I often felt so lost and uncertain).

Over time my lists evolved and I started to focus on things I'd stop or start doing to end the year healthier, happier and wiser.

Until finally, a few years ago my goal setting petered out completely.

Because what I'd discovered, when I reflected back on each year was that what that had bought me the most joy and delight were rarely, if ever, on my list. 

The things I treasured were simple, unexpected and unplanned for.

What I remembered were:  

People, family and friends I'd spent time with me.

Places I'd visited on a whim.

Day's which started without a plan and ended up being full of joy and adventure.  

Work which came from a chance encounter or a random conversation.

Beautiful people I'd met and hadn't even known the year before.

Courses I'd taken on instinct which then inspired and changed me in ways I couldn't have imagined.

So what I'm planning to do this year is to stay open and receptive to what wants and needs to emerge. 

And I'm already discovering that as I've stopped striving, I'm already content.

I've got more than enough to be happy as I am, and with what I already have.

So now, instead of a making a list of things to do, my annual list has become values I want to cultivate. Things like:

Ease instead of urgency. 
Presence instead of fragmentation.
Contentment instead of craving.
Courage instead of fear.
Vulnerability instead of armoured.
Authenticity instead of approval seeking.
Compassion instead of perfectionism.
Appreciation instead of grasping.

A list with nothing to achieve, and yet everything to gain.

So if you're like the 80% of people who've already broken your new years resolutions maybe those goals weren't the right ones for you anyway.

Maybe life is unfolding exactly as it was meant to and you can spend your precious time and energy focusing on valuing what brings you joy and makes you feel alive.

And I bet, by the end of the year you'll have done things you haven't imagined, with people you don't yet know, achieving more than you can dream. 

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