Have you been so busy surviving that you've forgotten how to thrive?

I read this poem a few years ago and I think it's a beautiful reminder that as we emerge from this latest lockdown we have a choice to make, individually and collectively, about whether the path we were on is the one we want to keep walking or whether we have the courage to choose a different way to live. 

An Autobiography in 5 short chapters - Portia Nelson

Chapter I
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost. 
I am helpless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes me forever to find a way out.

Chapter II
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in the same place.
But it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter III
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in.
It's a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

Chapter IV
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter V
I walk down another street.
 

Denial is the refusal to admit the truth or existence of something. 

And by it's nature, when we're in it, we can't see it. 

It happens in 3 stages:

First we ignore it.
Then we distort it.
Then we re-write it.

Denial often serves to keep us safe and yet over time, our thinking, our lives and our communities can become limited by these self imposed parameters we invisibly erected. 

What we're denying, slowly becomes who we think we are. 

Life has a habit though of creating larger and more painful 'holes' for us to fall into. 

I think in many ways the past year has been one gigantic, global sized 'hole'.

And for many there's been a recognition that the street we were walking on is not necessarily one we want to return to. 

For you it might be a recognition that work was taking up too much energy and time or that you're kids have loved seeing more of you; that you've had more time to look after your health or your hobbies or that there are people and experiences you've missed more than you ever thought possible. 

We've been so busy surviving we've forgotten how to thrive.  

Yet it's hard to choose a different path. 

Consciously facing what we've been ignoring isn't easy. 

For with choice comes responsibility. 

And with responsibility comes change and change can feel scary. 

Yet when we're willing to ask what it staring us in the face that we're refusing to look at, we have the option to start thinking afresh about what's possible. 

And then we can take the first small steps along a new path. 

And over time we find ourselves on a new and exciting street. 

So, if you're starting to question where you want to go next and what you want to retain from this past year I want you to know you're not alone. 

There are many others who are choosing to make small changes in how they live, how they spend their precious time and where they put their attention. 

And I'll happily be your companion if there's a hole you're starting to think you might need a hand to get out of.