I first came into contact with Time to Think almost ten years ago in London when a group of women leaders, who were mentoring our young women’s leadership project, introduced us to some of the concepts.
I was as much drawn to the tools and concepts as I was to the women who seemed to ooze ease. At that time that was the opposite of how I felt and I was desperate to find what seemed to be the magical elixir that made women into leaders of influence.
I was sure that that this breed of women were in some way fundamentally different to me, but I was willing to try and learn to be a close imitation.
One of those women mentored me for a short time and she shared two things with me that changed my whole perspective. One, was that she regularly cried in meetings and that was OK. And two, she had faith in my ability to think for myself, and gave me the space to do that.
It was at this point I realised that we are all human and that those who I admired had found a way to be themselves not someone else - and that we could all do that.
As a wonderful stroke of luck, my new employer had coincidentally introduced Time to Think as the framework for all internal meetings, so I got to see the great benefit of how this approach can transform how an organisation operates for the better. As I was relatively new to work at this stage, I just assumed that Time to Think was just how things were done!
Fast forward to a move to Sheffield three years ago, starting at South Yorkshire Housing Association, and a request for books we’d recommend for the work library. I immediately suggested Nancy Kline Time to Think, which my lovely manager decided to read immediately and was a quick and passionate convert!
SYHA embraced Time to Think and accordingly employed the skills of Sophie to deliver some training on facilitating meetings. I was lucky enough to be in the training and the subject of a Time to Think Council which transformed a really sticky problem that I was having. I was struck again by the ease that Sophie embodied and how human and intuitive the process felt.
I was lucky enough to be selected for an internal leadership programme and our first book for our book club was Time to Think! Embarrassingly up until this point I had never actually read the book from beginning to end and I remember getting shivers about this absolute war cry for us to teach ourselves to think for ourselves.
As a result, when I got promoted into a new internal role and had the opportunity for some coaching I had three sessions with Sophie. I have never experienced such a strong and lasting impact on my perspective and I could see a positive tangible effect on my work - it was like a miracle.
I am an experiential person and having felt the impact of the Time to Think approach in so many different contexts I was a complete convert and thirsty to learn more.
Sophie was a speaker for an event I hosted for women in their twenties exploring leadership - and trying to challenge those views I’d had in my twenties that female leaders are in fact another breed. The event asked four female leaders to talk about their ‘mistakes’ and vulnerabilities and to share their stories to leadership.
The day after the event I received an email from Sophie inviting me to be the first recipient of her initiative to support a young woman on the course. I am not going to lie - I cried with joy! It wasn’t just that I was being offered a chance to learn more deeply about the things I’d been craving to explore, but it was such an act of faith in me, a faith that continues to nourish me.
I have now completed the Thinking Partnership Course and I will be shortly be completing the Time to Think Coaching course in November and December. The first course coincided with me applying for more senior roles, and was the bedrock of how I approached the process.
I was quite burned out at the time and I remember quite vividly taking some time to have a little nap in the sun by the stream. This epitomises everything I love and have benefited from in Time to Think.
I was given permission to think for myself about what I most needed in that moment, and I had learned that my best thinking comes from taking care of myself and supporting my ease.
All through my twenties and a large part of my thirties I thought I had to learn how to think like those women who seemed so much better than me and strive every sinew in pursuit of perfection. It didn’t get me very far, and my thinking and energy was like butter spread over too much bread (to quote a Hobbit!). In exploring the the 10 components and practising with them on the course I have really begun to understand that this was not only not helpful, but counterproductive.
What an absolute delight to discover that I need to focus on creating conditions that reflect that I matter.
I have now secured my first senior leadership position, and I feel excited about this opportunity largely because I have faith in my ability to create the conditions to support my best thinking.
I also now have had the great fortune to be connected to like minded women who have listened and shared with me with huge generosity and care over the last few months and I know this will continue.
One of the things I am most excited about in this role is the opportunity to use and share Time to Think with the organisation and wonderful women I will be managing - I now know that my most important role is to create the conditions for them to think for themselves. For some reason, Time to Think has sought me out and continues to teach me that I have everything I need, and supports me to fulfill my potential.